Finding my motivation

© Sarah Woodside

For years people told me that in order to succeed at weight loss I had to really want it and I used to get so upset and defensive, taking everyone’s comments as a personal attack. How did they know how much I wanted it? I was working hard and it felt like every comment was undermining my weight loss efforts. But in reality it is only this time around that I really understand what they truly meant.

My motivation is me. Now that may sound egotistical to some, but it’s true. I have spent years looking at other peoples weight loss and transformation pictures wishing it was me, but this time it will be. Of course I still take massive inspiration from everyone I come across, every Instagram account I stumble on and every blog I read, but the only person who can lose this weight is me.

Is it easy this time around? Of course not as I’ve said countless times before weight loss is hard work, if it was easy everyone would be the perfect weight. But this time I know I want to see the change. I want to feel comfortable in a sleeveless top more than I want a takeaway. I want to be healthy to start a family more than I want chocolate. I want to wake up feeling good about myself and not hating myself, more than I want full fat coca-cola.

Every day is difficult for me, I am 27-years-old and have spent a lifetime shovelling in food and damaging my body.  A lifetime of bad habits are hard to break, especially when you live with a man that is tall, skinny and can eat anything and everything he wants. Everyday I fight with myself to make the right choice, it’s a never ending battle, but one I am happily winning so far.

It isn’t easy sitting on the sofa next to the man, as he eats all the bad food I crave non-stop. I can smell the chocolate, practically taste the crisps and cakes and it’s safe to say I want it all! My hearing must perk up whenever he has something I want but can’t have, every chomp and slurp makes it harder. He’ll be the first to tell you that on occasion he has been at the receiving end of a torrent of abuse for chewing loudly or eating too much, he’s also been at the receiving end of, “it’s not fair, why am I fat and you’re skinny, you eat more than me,” but that’s the luck of the drawer, he can’t lose my weight for me.

Only I can motivate myself to make good choices, work hard, and push for the healthier life I so desperately want. So how do I do it?

Every day I look back at my Slimming World journey so far, looking at my progress inspires me to keep on going. I stay on plan, and when confronted with temptation I make a decision. Is this tempting item worth the guilt and my sadness when I step on the scales or shall I find an alternative and feel amazing on the scales. Nothing is more liberating than standing on those scales feeling confident and being rewarded with a loss. Of course weight loss isn’t all about the numbers on the scale, inches and non scale victories also play a massive part. But nothing compares to seeing numbers I haven’t seen in years flash up in front of me.

I am a competitive person at the best of times, I was the child who kicked the monopoly board, stormed off and slammed doors, I thrive on competition, but I don’t want to compare to others and push myself to compete, that sets me up for disappointment. I want to compete with myself so I write monthly goals.

Monthly goals allow me to push for something, to use my success so far as a tool to motivate myself to continue doing well or dare I say it, do better. It has helped me maintain the belief and  knowledge that I can do it because I already have. Mini goals may not work for everyone and if you are the type of person that makes themselves feel like a failure if you don’t meet your goals than I implore you to find something else to motivate you.

As all of you know there is no magic secret to weight loss, no matter how many wishes you make you won’t wake up ten stone lighter, but you can wake up half a pound lighter (or more!) Find the reason you are doing this, remember it and use it.

If you are slimming for a wedding think about how amazing you want to look in your dress, is that worth the family galaxy size bar of chocolate?

If you are losing weight for your children, think about them, think of how proud you are making them, think of all the good habits they are picking up from your weight loss, maybe that will stop them entering a life of yo yo dieting and sadness related to their weight, is that worth jeopardising for a takeaway and a bottle or two of wine?

I’m not saying deprive yourself but make good choices for you. Only you can lose the extra weight. If you want the wine have it, but count the syns and stay in control, if you want chocolate have it, but in moderation, do you really want the sharing bar more than a loss on weigh day?

The last thing I want is for this post to sound cruel, or even preaching, as you all know my history of weight loss and it certainly hasn’t been a smooth ride. But I want you to realise your self worth, you are worth more than binge eating because you didn’t do as well as you wanted, or stress eating because everything is on top of you and food is your comfort, you can do this. Every time I choose not too have something I shouldn’t it gets easier, I don’t feel like i’m missing out and it’s a win for my will power, this can happen for you to, you just have to believe that you can do it.

You can be your biggest motivation if only you let yourself.

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One thought on “Finding my motivation

  1. In no way, shape or form does this blog post sound cruel or preachy. You are speaking the truth. Not everyone likes to hear it, but it is the reality for most of us. At the end of the day a person has to decide that they are worth more than a packet of crisps and a bar of chocolate! I applaud you for your honesty.

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